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5 Things I Wish More Older Women Would Teach Younger Women (Like Me)

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This is a guest post by my wonderful wife, Hannah. I’m glad she wanted to write this article, and I really hope you enjoy it! You can read her blog and follow her on Twitter.

teachTitus 2:3-5 isn’t vague in reference to the responsibility older women have to admonish and teach younger women. Check it out:

The older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things—that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed. (NKJV)

God obviously sees older women as his own messengers he’s sending us girls to show us how to grow into faithful, happy, Christian women. 

While I know some godly women who take this passage seriously, diligently teaching younger women how to live a rich, God-filled life, I know many more Christian ladies who seem to ignore this passage.  We live in a very keep-to-yourself, mind-your-own-buisness society, and I think the fear of “getting in our business” has affected the amount of wisdom older women are sharing with us. I’m not going to talk about who is to blame for that, but I know for me personally, I want all godly women to know that I give them full permission to stick their noses right in my business if it means helping me go to heaven. I need that guidance God talked about in Titus 2. I need advice, tips, and even constructive criticism from older women who I respect.

Here are 5 things about which I wish older women would teach younger women (like me): 

1. How To Have A Happy Marriage 

I want and need older women who have successfully remained in a godly marriage to teach me how they did that. I need advice about how to truly reverence my husband (Ephesians 5:33), even when that isn’t easy. I need to know how to show my husband that I’m in his corner all the time—I need to know how to make him thankful he married me every day of the week. I need to know how to be the spiritual support my husband needs as we strive to help each other go to heaven. I need to know how to practice agape love, even when the “in-love” feelings aren’t present.

2. How To Be A Homemaker

In our culture drenched with feminism, self-obsession, and individualism, there isn’t much acceptance, much less encouragement and affirmation, left there for women who take God’s Word seriously enough to choose to stay home and raise their children as devoted homemakers. I’m talking about the women who choose to do this, not because they can’t do other things (like climbing that corporate ladder), but because they accept their roles as God-fearing women who want their children to go to heaven. I need older women to show me that this choice isn’t silly or demeaning, as the world would have me to believe, but rather a rich, fulfilling lifestyle filled with abundant rewards. I need advice about how to be a domestic (which, by the way, is the Greek definition of that word “homemaker” in Titus 2). I need all your tips on how to make our home a peaceful, God-centered haven even during chaotic times. I need advice about how to practice hospitality and use my home to extend love to those in need. This includes cooking shortcuts, housework secrets, decorating ideas, how to entertain guests, and so much more. Don’t make Pinterest my only resource for learning how to be a keeper at home. I will be missing out on a lot of godly wisdom.

3. How To Evangelize

I often feel like the only people in my church family who teach me how to bring people to the Lord are preachers who might speak on the topic occasionally. That’s quite a shame, considering the command we are all expected to obey is so clear, and yet so overlooked (Mark 16:15). I need all kinds of ideas and Bible study tools that will help me show God’s love and his plan for salvation to others who are lost. I need you to be the kind of person I can accompany on a Bible study and see how to meet people where they are and be able to share God’s Word in a simple and loving manner. I need accountability. If I tell you I’m trying to influence a friend for Christ, I need you to ask me about it from time to time. I need you to remind me that eternity is the only thing that truly matters—that the people I see every day are not just people—they’re souls.

4. How To Be A Godly Mother 

I’m not a mother yet, but I know without a shadow of a doubt that I will desperately need help learning how to train up my children in the way they should go (Proverbs 22:6).  I need you to make it clear to me that you are someone I can pick up the phone and call when my child is as stubborn as I was as a child and is pushing the limits. I need to know that I can ask you if I am handling a parenting dilemma in a godly way, and be able to trust that you will give me an honest, Biblical answer.

5. How To Be A Teacher

I am saddened when I see so many older women who seem to just decide they are too old to actively participate in the work of the church. Isn’t it all too common that there are always those one or two women who seem to be doing most of the work? Isn’t it true that most churches only have a handful of women who would be willing to teach a ladies Bible class or something else leadership-related? I understand completely that not everyone is cut out for public speaking, but if you are, I covet your advice and most of all your encouragement to help me to step out of my comfort zone and be willing to say yes when most would find some excuse to say no. I need you to not only ask me to get involved, but show me how to do what you do.


If you’re a young woman reading this, I’m sure you have a plethora of things you could add to this list, like how to be classy (another word for “discreet”) or how to make smart financial choices for your family. I’d love to hear them, so feel free to comment.

What I want to tell the older women more than anything is this: Yes, we need teaching, advice, and at times, criticism, but what we need more than anything else is encouragement. If you are an older woman who knows young women who are doing everything in their power to live for God, grab them, hug them, and tell them you appreciate them and are there for them. Make yourself available for us, and most of all, view us as souls who sincerely need your help getting to heaven.


9 Responses to 5 Things I Wish More Older Women Would Teach Younger Women (Like Me)

  1. Ursula Torbett July 5, 2013 at 10:51 AM #

    Beautifully done, thank you!

  2. Marilyn Gossett July 5, 2013 at 12:25 PM #

    Very good Hannah, keep up the good work! I taught a teen class using one of your books a few .years ago, and this is a good reminder to me to keep teaching the younger women.

  3. cindycolley July 5, 2013 at 4:18 PM #

    Even if you are mine, I have to say this is excellent!

  4. Tara July 5, 2013 at 11:20 PM #

    Yes, you’re so right! Oh how I wish I had known these things early in my marriage and in my young Christian life. I have failed at some, and I know I drive my children bananas trying to impress upon them NOT to make the same mistakes that I did. Keep on encouraging us middle-aged women as well as the “older” women! :D

  5. Jennifer July 6, 2013 at 1:20 AM #

    This is fantastic! I totally agree with all of these. One I’d add is, “How to keep going when you feel physically and spiritually exhausted? Does this happen to other Christian women?” I feel ashamed to admit that because I feel like I should always feel like a spiritual cheerleader ;)

  6. Charlie July 6, 2013 at 3:56 PM #

    “I’m talking about the women who choose to do this, not because they can’t do other things (like climbing that corporate ladder), but because they accept their roles as God-fearing women who want their children to go to heaven.” Women who work want their children to go to heaven too. Many of us who work did not choose to do this for selfish reasons but rather to help financially and provide insurance for our family. It is unfortunate that many Christian women judge other Christian women who must work.

  7. Sara July 6, 2013 at 9:39 PM #

    This is excellent, thank you! I wish I had more older women in my life that I felt comfortable seeking advice from.

  8. Lillian September 11, 2013 at 4:06 PM #

    I want to do this so badly, that my heart and soul ache. My husband and I just left a congregation that we felt was going in the wrong direction. After 7 years there and being a ladies leader of our group, for 2 years we held monthly meetings, tried to get together for Bible studies, and other encouraging events. Coming from the side of the older woman, which I am blessed to be, the younger women would not come to the Bible studies, or show up to the luncheons, or even listen to the older women. I pray that this new congregation will allow me to fulfill my duties as the older woman. I am so glad you have written this article. So I know that there are younger women out there ready to be helped and guided.


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